I have been having a lot of conversations this week about owning our own value. I notice when speaking to people about what their unique value is, they squirm, pull faces, laugh or speak in an almost inaudible whisper.
And it’s not their fault, we are taught from a young age … don’t show off … don’t get too big for your boots… pride comes before a fall...
It’s almost in our DNA to stay small… as if feeling good about ourselves was going to be bad for us … dangerous
And so our nervous system is screaming at us to stop… stop talking about ourselves in a positive way … it’s not safe.
When I work with clients I recognise patterns, ways in which we try to keep ourselves safe when talking about our own value;
Questioning or downplaying often despite the facts and evidence demonstrating our value.
Only recognising our value as being due to the outside contributions of other people and the training we have.
Putting any success down to luck or simply that ‘anyone’ could have done it.
These consistent micro messages - that we are not worthy of the success we have had, that we are not a factor in the value we offer the world, that it is all from outside of us - serve to keep us uncertain of ourselves, often referred to as imposter syndrome.
And what it there was another way?
And so I invite my clients to get really serious about the messages they are giving themselves day in day out… when they talk about feeling uncertain, scared and holding back on taking action that they deeply desire to do or feeling like they are not good enough, comparing themselves to other people around them – this is where I start…
Through coaching I create a safe space to allow those old beliefs to quieten, to support the recognition of what they uniquely bring to the world… explore and develop certainly around this… take purposeful action to change the inner narrative and build a core foundation of confidence in themselves that can’t be swayed or taken away.
What would be different for you if you recognised that the unique value you bring is down to you?
What action would you be taking of you truly believed in your own unique value?
I would love to hear what this brings up for your and if you would like to go deeper lets jump on a possibility call
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